I blame my Muse. I have given myself a deadline to have a new book published and my Muse teases me with bits and pieces and then abandons me for long periods of time and Free Cell (and Plants vs Zombies). I have a little more than three months to have this thing ready and I have no songs and only half the tracks written.
“You know what?” she asked.
“You’re going to help me finish my novel which I am running out of time on?”
“I’ll get to that. You’re overdue for a parody.”
“I haven’t had time to watch many movies. I still need to get to Iron Man 3…”
“No, no, something else.”
“Look, Muse, I’m trying to get through the Brontë sisters, but wow some of those novels are much longer than I expected….”
“Not one of those novels, my poor uninspired author.”
My Muse can be quite condescending to me sometimes.
“What do you want from me?” I asked. This is not an uncommon question.
“So, I’ve been thinking about The Hobbit…”
“Yeah, you do that. I have more articles about that book and those movies than anything else I think, except maybe Batman.”
“Well, you know, Batman,” my Muse said, agreeing with me.
“I’ve already done parodies of the movie trilogy. There’s nothing else. That well is dry.”
“I’m the one who decides when the well is dry,” she retorted angrily. “There’s still the book.”
“The book? How can I parody a classic children’s story? Okay, well, I’m sure I could, but how could I do it in a way that might possibly be different and entertaining for my audience that will hopefully be one day thousands and thousands of dedicated fans?”
“Spare me the sarcasm,” she said.
“I have an idea for an approach you can use and it’s super dorky.”
“But what about Nevermore and the Ravens?”
“We’ll get to that,” she said impatiently. “So, now, I want to you remember back to that geek fraternity you used to hang out with…”
So here I am, a deadline fast approaching and my valuable and scarce free time spent on a story that I had no intention of writing, until apparently I did. Damn fickle Muse. ARGH!